Tag: Life Top

  • Elif Shafak’s ’10 minutes 38 seconds’ is thought-provoking, insightful and relevant

    Elif Shafak’s ’10 minutes 38 seconds’ is thought-provoking, insightful and relevant

    “We must do what we can to mend our lives, we owe that to ourselves – but we need to be careful not to break others while achieving that”.

    The main theme in Elif Shafak’s new book 10 minutes 38 seconds in this strange world is kindness and tolerance, or rather the lack of them in this world.

    The novel follows the journey of a young girl Leila from her small rustic village in the backroads of Turkey, to the bright lights, fast lanes and seedy underbelly of Istanbul. Here she suffers unspeakable ordeals, but at the same time also befriends a motley crew of vagrants, all trying to find their way in this strange world. Each has a different story, a different background but what is common to all of them is that each one lives on the outskirts of society; never really accepted. Never really loved.

    Elif has weaved the story in the beautiful way she usually does. Her words pulse with spirituality and insightful meaning. She has taken up the cause of those who cant stand up for themselves and whom society shuns.

    What really stands out for the reader is that humanity and human emotions are the same everywhere, as is bigotry and prejudice even if they have different faces in different cultures. This world ought to be safe place for everyone regardless of race, religion or orientation.

    Do read this for all the various themes she has addressed and definitely for her prose.

  • The state of mental health in Pakistan

    The state of mental health in Pakistan

    World Mental Health Day – 10 October – is a day for global mental health education, awareness and advocacy. On 10/10 each year professionals, health care organisations, advocacy groups, international and national agencies and individuals aim to bring attention to mental illness and its effects on people’s lives.

    Over the years, as a therapist, I have observed an increase in awareness and focus by individuals and advocacy groups in Pakistan to highlight mental health challenges. Though that’s brilliant, it also serves as a reminder of the state of the mental health in Pakistan and the uphill challenges we have to face. A day of celebration and remembrance is gone by 11/10 but the suffering of someone facing psychological issues isn’t. And we’ve all got to think about it because there’s a high likelihood that someone you know is facing mental health issues: in your own home, your class, your gym, your club or at your workplace.

    Here are some things that would be useful for you to know to educate yourself on this World Mental Health Day:

    1. Stop stigmatising the topic

    With the topic being stigmatised, most individuals don’t seek treatment believing that this wasn’t meant to happen to them, or it must be something else e.g. supernatural, temporary, etc. It’s a lot easier to ascribe our ill mental health to causes outside of us than to believe that we’re losing our mind. So people conceal their inner life and wear a mask showing they’re ok. The person sitting next to you may be wearing one, and you won’t know. In the rare instances that individuals open up to friends, coworkers and family about struggling the men are told that they are meant to be stronger; the women are told to stop thinking too much and serve families; the children are told to stop wasting time and focus on their studies; and the elderly are advised to attend to God and be grateful.

    WHAT CAN YOU DO – If your brother, spouse, friend, co-worker seems distressed, irritated, gloomy, distracted, offer to listen to them if they’d like to share what’s bothering them. Don’t offer any advice, just listen to them and offer support and understanding. Validate their struggle and where you feel you can’t offer help, encourage them to seek professional help.

    2. Emotional and psychological wounds don’t always show

    Someone who was teased for their looks or weight, mocked for their grades, made fun of for their complexion, touched without their consent, humiliated in front of others or unfriended without explaining may seem okay on the outside, but even 20 years later be struggling very deeply as a consequence of it. We assume that someone who holds a degree, a job or having a family has come out okay, but there’s more to it than meets the eye.

    WHAT CAN YOU DO – If you’ve caused this kind of sorrow to your child or friend, take responsibility. Commit to being mindful of your words from now onwards. As a parent, don’t break your child’s bones or their self-esteem thinking this is for their best. It is not, and chances are you’re reliving the trauma of your own parents treating you this way, and this cycle has got to stop with your seeking help.

    As a friend, be a safe one, and not the jerk who’d be spoken about in my office 20 years later as the reason why someone quit university or didn’t aim higher in life. Be the friend that understood others when they were at our weakest.

    3. Anxiety, depression, trauma, eating disorders are medically as valid conditions as hepatitis, ulcers and cholesterol.

    Just like cholesterol can’t be exorcised away, and hepatitis cured by praying for it, anxiety, depression, trauma, eating disorders, etc also require attention. Mental illnesses especially psychosis, eating disorders, bipolar disorder and autism are understood to have biological roots. The estimated heritability for bipolar disorder, schizophrenia, and autism (80% or higher) is much higher than that of diseases like breast cancer and Parkinson’s disease.

    WHAT CAN YOU DO – Refer them to a proper mental health specialist and encourage them to seek treatment. Don’t act doctor to your friend who says nothing makes them happy and they don’t wish to live. You won’t try to cure someone’s cancer would you? Stop trying to treat mental health concerns if you’re not qualified to do so.

    4. A psychologist or therapist is not meant to give you medication

    This one’s straight – if they’re doing that, they are acting unethically, and that is considered a good ground for malpractice in countries abroad. Only a psychiatrist (someone who holds a medical degree as well as a training to diagnose mental illnesses) is authorised to prescribe medication and that too if needed.

    WHAT CAN YOU DO – If someone seeking help has severe symptoms (e.g. suicidal ideation and intent is strong, are hallucinating, have impaired functionality) they should first be assessed by a psychiatrist to determine if medication is necessary. For someone who feels they can work on their issues for weeks and months, a good starting point would be a therapist or psychologist.

    5. People recover from mental health issues

    Our brain over its entire lifespan is capable of changing and rewiring. Don’t assume that you visited a shrink 30 years ago and that didn’t help, and now it’s too late. Things have drastically changed since then, in terms of how and what we can do to help. Every year new technologies are emerging which promise better care, management, and treatments available.

    WHAT CAN YOU DO – It is human to be affected by pain. If you’re in pain, seek help. It’s never too late. I work with people in a broad age range, professions, classes, sexual orientations, ethnic backgrounds, status who have benefited from being in therapy.

    On this mental health day, let’s be more mindful of attending to the every day stuff that happens in our emotional lives as well as that of people whom we love and live with. Let’s not let these every day stressors become something more difficult. One day you’ll have to attend to them. So don’t wait for that. And if you or a loved one are in the midst of complicated emotional circumstances please seek help.

  • Raheela: The Girl Child

    It’s the International Day of the Girl and Pakistan is shamelessly on the bottom of the global ranking in empowering them. They face death; stunted growth; violence; child labour and limited or no access to education and medical care.

    I took a dirt road two hours away from Peshawar in 2017 to find out more about how young girls with no access to education can be brought back into the gig economy.

    I spoke to about a dozen young girls and recorded their
    interviews to put a report for the people who were working to change the
    traditional set up in the conservative Khyber Pakhtunkhwa (KP) district.

    I spoke to the adolescent girls learning vocational skills like tutoring, tailoring and computer skills. Some girls between 15 and 19 were clad in burqas, others in chadors and most, in a deep sense of shame. Their body language was subdued and their presence was mild like they were a bit too grateful for the donor support I had gone to assess.

    Raheela was an unforgettable young girl. She was a Frida
    Pinto lookalike, big eyes and a chiseled jawbone with fierceness about her life
    story that both humbled and awed me. She was what we call a success story that
    we were to tout for more funding in the area of adolescent girls, where
    government support failed or was neglectful.

    Raheela had learned to make a lot of money over the past few
    months. She was given a grant to receive a brand new Singer sewing machine. The
    machine allowed her to sell clothes to local women that she sewed faster and
    better. She could now afford to send her younger siblings to school. That
    month, she made more money in thirty days than her drunk and abusive father
    made in a year.

    Many would consider this a success, but for Raheela, it meant a disrupted order of status quo that led her father to rage and episodic beatings.

    She looked at me to answer questions with a black eye that she unsuccessfully attempted to mask under a cheap concealer, three shades lighter than her wheat skin colour. I had to, so I asked her about the black-blue eye.

    Her face comes to me like a floating ghost when I hear politicians rattle their podiums and make big promises. When big men with power claim justice for the common people who are facing stagflation in the economy, I wonder if they really ever see Raheela.

    Am I ugly, bad and unworthy? She asked me in response.

    No.

    I said she was beautiful and good and worthy and that it was
    the people who exploited her that should be put away.

    She was not fearless, but she was incredibly brave.

    Today, we mark the International Day of the Girl Child, so I went back to my notes from that day I met Raheela.

    I often think of Raheela because she is far away from the
    cult of cool that many young adolescent girls her age are obsessed with. She
    cares more about how to hide her siblings when her father picks up the rod than
    she does about getting the corners of her wing eyeliner right. Her life is more
    immediate and her troubles are not imagined.

    Her face comes to me like a floating ghost when I hear politicians rattle their podiums and make big promises. When big men with power claim justice for the common people who are facing stagflation in the economy, I wonder if they really ever see Raheela. I wonder if they hear the tremble in her voice when she describes going back to a home where she faces chronic punishment for working to support her family. I wonder if they even know that in this country, girls are prematurely sexualised and prematurely made into grown-up adults when they are too young to even understand their own bodies.

    I’m going to dare to dream a world for her today because that is what the day calls for – after all the GirlForce is unscripted and unstoppable.

    If I could reimagine a world for Pakistan’s Raheela, I would dare to dream that she has a lot of hygiene. That she has access to sanitary pads that are biodegradable and safe. Many girls in the programme who enter puberty end up missing their vocational classes just because they are on their period. The norm is unsanitary cloth packs that leak and limit their mobility. I want a world where a period doesn’t signal young women’s child-bearing age, but an age that needs care and protection from people who have an exploitative mindset. Commercial sanitary pads are prohibitively expensive in rural areas and there is no education on how to maintain mobility during menstruation. As a result, menstruation is used as a weapon to ground Raheela.

    I often think of Raheela because she is far away from the cult of cool that many young adolescent girls her age are obsessed with. She cares more about how to hide her siblings when her father picks up the rod than she does about getting the corners of her wing eyeliner right.

    I would also imagine a world for her where the road to the vocational centre would not be planted with land mines of honour culture. Where the local village perverts won’t call her a slut for wandering instead of being invisible. I’d want local police to punish those men if they dare make her feel threatened. Instead, local police usually victim-blame young women who face eve-teasing and sexual harassment. Raheela was asked to go back home and fetch her abusive father before a legal complaint is lodged. She ended up not complaining and facing the men in her path day after day, passively.

    It would be rather nice if Raheela had a basic smartphone that allowed her to receive her stipend in a mobile wallet, safe from the drug-addiction ambitions of her father. A mobile wallet that allows her to buy her mother the medicines she needs to repair her mental health, her self-esteem and her social embarrassment for only giving birth to girls.

    Access to the internet would be great for Raheela. She could get socially connected to friends and family she trusts and can rely on. She could even search the latest fashion trends to remix in the clothes she designs and sells in larger cities. She could learn English, the language the internet uses and sharpen her Urdu skills using tutorials. She could search for entertainment and watch shows that give her respite from her reality. She could use YouTube to research how to manage money and do basic bookkeeping so her business can stay afloat longer.

    I’d want a world where Raheela knows that elsewhere in the universe, there are doctors who perform surgeries remotely; that holograms exist; that future jobs will focus on creativity and collaboration; that there are smart shoes that measure everything including steps. Most importantly, that she can protect her digital footprint and have her cyber world secure from prying eyes of men who can hurt her now or in the future. She could know her rights as a citizen. She would know then, that the state has promised to protect her, educate her for free and punish anyone who harms her physically. That would change her mindset.

    I want Raheela to know that clothes look better when you wear them on your back while standing up straight, chin up, shoulders back. Raheela is not ugly, not a bad person and she is not unworthy of this dream I have dreamed entirely on her behalf.

    I’d like to give her some representation in the local government, perhaps even as a citizen. She could understand that there are others like her suffering in the community and hold a town hall with them to support community involvement. Raheela could help create public pressure to have easier access to schools, transport, healthcare and plumbing by speaking up for more young women.

    I want Raheela to know that clothes look better when you wear them on your back while standing up straight, chin up, shoulders back. Raheela is not ugly, not a bad person and she is not unworthy of this dream I have dreamed entirely on her behalf.

    It’s the International Day of the Girl. Pakistan is shamelessly on the bottom of the global ranking in empowering them. Girls in Pakistan face death; stunted growth; violence; child labour and limited or no access to education and medical care.

    It’s too late for Raheela, by now she may have a few girls of her own, her father may have won at patriarchy and she may have lost at it. Can we please get this dream in a politician’s speech so it could maybe… maybe become a part of the cult of cool that some girls can never reach.

  • Vaccination to replace poisoning for rabies eradication in Sindh

    Vaccination to replace poisoning for rabies eradication in Sindh

    Authorities in Sindh have decided to avoid the traditional method of fighting rabies by choosing to vaccinate the stray dogs instead of poisoning them to eradicate the deadly virus.

    As per reports, the decision was taken by Karachi Commissioner Iftikhar Shallwani in light of the rise in the death toll due to rabies across Sindh. The meeting was co-chaired by Health Secretary Saeed Awan.

    In the meeting, it was decided that a complete plan to vaccinate the stray dogs in Sindh would be designed with the guidance of the Department of Infectious Diseases at The Indus Hospital (TIH) and the World Health Organisation (WHO).

    Moreover, it was also agreed that a training program should be conducted by the TIH’s Department of Infectious Diseases at all major public hospitals in Sindh to train doctors for ensuring effective vaccination and treatement of the disease. Training will be given to the doctors through different workshops and seminars.

  • Mother helps police arrest son for kidnapping minor girl

    Mother helps police arrest son for kidnapping minor girl

    Police officials have recovered an eleven-year-old girl from Chishtian who was kidnapped at the age of two from Multan. The mother of the kidnapper assisted the police in arresting her son.

    As per reports, the recovery of the girl was made after the kidnapper’s mother revealed that her son had brought a minor girl home nine years ago and claimed to be the child’s father after his secret marriage.

    The woman told the police that she suspected his claims as the innocent child was subjected to torture by her son. Later, the brave mother stepped forward by herself to file a case against son’s alleged crime at a local police station. 

    The parents of the girl were traced through DNA tests and
    handed over to them after nine years.

    The police said that the local administration will assist the parents in organising the marriage of the recently recovered girl. They praised the mother for setting an example by registering a case against her son. The local police department has also commenced a thorough investigation against the alleged kidnapper.

  • Everyday-use items dirtier than toilet seats

    Everyday-use items dirtier than toilet seats

    We all think that there is nothing dirtier than toilet seats; we keep wipes in case we need to use the washroom at a public place or our offices or even at a friend’s place. Well, you’re wrong. There are other everyday items that are dirtier than our toilet seats!

    Smartphones

    A lot of us use our smartphones on the toilet. This means that our smartphone screens could be covered in 10 times more bacteria than a toilet seat. Clean your smartphones with anti-bacterial wipes if you use them in the washroom.

    Make-up bags & brushes

    Make-up bags and accessories often harbour bacteria. If you use brushes that have contact with your skin and then put them back into the same bag, you’re transferring germs from your skin to the bag and then back again when you reuse them. Make sure to wash your brushes and clean out your kit at least once a week.

    Filters in washing machine & fridge

    The purpose of filters is to trap all the dirt and debris that make its way through the system, it is inevitable that these filters eventually get overloaded and clogged. Make sure you clean out the lint catcher in your washing machine and the filter tray under your fridge, as both are prone to building up germs.

    Side of ovens

    Ovens that are built-in are vulnerable to food spillage that falls from the pan and down the side of the oven. This not only leaves bad odour but also creates bacteria. The only way to clean this is by taking the oven out of where it is placed and thoroughly cleaning it.

  • Pakistani designers Duchess Kate should consider wearing

    Pakistani designers Duchess Kate should consider wearing

    After Kate Middleton made a statement at the Agha Khan event last week in teal clothes and earrings by Pakistani brand Zeen, which by the way, sold out within minutes, all eyes are on the Duchess and what she will be wearing on her four-day tour to Pakistan. It is quite likely that she will be donning outfits by Pakistani designers and we cannot wait to see her in a simple shalwar kameez.

    To help the Duchess, here are five Pakistani designers that she should consider wearing.

    Amna Chaudhry

    Karachi-based designer Amna Chaudhry’s clothes have an understated elegance about them which quite matches Kate’s own personal style. We recommend her to wear the black outfit Mahira Khan wore.

    Bunto Kazmi

    Given that Kate will be heading to the mountainous North in fall, a Bunto shawl is an absolute essential. Not only will it look beautiful, but it will also keep the Duchess warm when the night gets cold.

    Élan

    When it comes to glamourous formal wear, we couldn’t think of anyone other than Élan. We’d love to see Kate in an embellished kaftan or cape from the brand.

    Generation

    Generation is the best when it comes to quintessential Pakistani clothes – traditional and ethnic. A churidar pyjama or shalwar kameez by Generation should be on Kate’s rack. We can totally imagine her posing at Badshahi Masjid in traditional attire.

    Lulusar

    Trendy and modern, Kate can wear an outfit by Lulusar for her business meetings and other day events.

  • Beat anxiety: 5 foods that help reduce anxiety

    Beat anxiety: 5 foods that help reduce anxiety

    Stress and anxiety are feelings that one battles on a regular basis – whether at home or in the workplace. According to the American Psychological Association, anxiety is an emotion characterised by feelings of tension, worried thoughts and physical changes like increased blood pressure.

    Though medication is often required as treatment, there are many simple ways you can follow to control the feeling and reduce the pressure you feel. For example by exercising, deep breathing or lighting a scented candle. Apart from that, there are some foods you can eat to lower the anxiety mostly due to their brain-boosting properties.

    On World Mental Health Day, here are a list of food items that might help you reduce stress and anxiety.

    Turmeric

    Turmeric is a spice that contains curcumin, a compound
    known for its role in promoting brain health and preventing anxiety disorders.
    Curcumin also has powerful antioxidant and anti-inflammatory properties that
    have been shown to prevent damage to brain cells.

    Yogurt

    If you suffer from social anxiety, yogurt is a great food to include in your diet. The probiotics (healthy bacteria) found in yogurt can improve your mental health.

    Note that not all yogurt contains probiotics. For the benefits of probiotics, choose a yogurt that has “live active cultures” mentioned in the ingredients.

    Almonds

    Research has shown that magnesium may be an effective treatment for anxiety-related symptoms. Just 1 ounce of almonds (almost 12 nuts)­ contains 75mg of magnesium which is brilliant for reducing anxiety and stress. You can also find magnesium in foods such as seeds, and avocado.

    Dark Chocolate

    Dark chocolate contains antioxidants that may benefit
    brain function.

    They do this by improving blood flow to the brain and
    promoting its ability to cope with stressful situations. These effects may
    allow you to adjust better to the stressful situations that can lead to anxiety
    and other mood disorders.

    Some researchers also suggest that dark chocolate’s role
    in brain health may simply be due to its taste, which can be comforting for
    those with mood disorders.

    However, dark chocolate is best consumed in moderation,
    as it is high in calories and easy to overeat. 1–1.5 ounces is a reasonable
    serving size.

    Eggs

    Eggs have serotonin in them. Serotonin is a chemical
    neurotransmitter that helps to regulate mood, sleep, memory, and behavior.
    Serotonin is also thought to improve brain function and relieve anxiety.

  • COMSATS registrar says no one responsible for student’s death

    COMSATS registrar says no one responsible for student’s death

    COMSATS University registrar Dr Fahim has said that no one is responsible for the death of student Inam ul Haq Javed and that no one could be held accountable for it.

    The registrar said that the student of Islamabad’s COMSATS University died after suffering a heart attack. Dr Fahim said that Inam had come out from a classroom after giving a group presentation when he fell unconscious and had a heart attack.

    According to details, some students came to him and started rubbing his hands. They told the guard to get an ambulance to take him to a nearby hospital.

    A university vehicle reached the spot and the student was taken to the university’s medical center, from where he was shifted to the National Institute of Health, which is five minutes away from the university. The doctors declared him dead on arrival.

    Meanwhile, Inam’s classmates claimed that the university administration didn’t provide them any help in taking him to a hospital and even prevented an ambulance from entering the university premises. They added that there was also no first aid available on the campus because of which Javed’s condition worsened.

    Students of the university on Friday protested and blamed the administration for their class fellow’s death. Javed was the only son of his parents. He had two sisters.

    Dr Fahim shared that an investigation committee has been formed to look into the matter and that “we will see which teacher stopped an ambulance from entering the varsity.”

    More than 9,000 students study at the campus for which
    only three doctors have been appointed. Two sit in the morning and one in the
    evening. These doctors handle cases of minor accidents.

  • Gaddafi Stadium to turn pink during Pakistan-Sri Lanka T20

    Gaddafi Stadium to turn pink during Pakistan-Sri Lanka T20

    The Gaddafi Stadium in Lahore will turn pink during the third T20I between Pakistan and Sri Lanka to raise awareness about breast cancer.

    As per reports, a ceremony will be held before the third T20I between Pakistan and Sri Lanka, which will be attended by President Dr. Arif Alvi and Pakistan Cricket Board Chairperson Ehsan Mani. The president will also pin pink ribbons on both team captains, while players and match officials will don the ribbons throughout the match.

     The stumps for the last T2oI of the series will be
    branded in pink whereas the sponsors of the series will also be changing their
    branding colors in the ground to pink. The cricket board has asked the fans to
    wear pink to support the cause.

    The PCB stated that Pakistan has the highest number of
    breast cancer cases amongst all Asian countries and this step is a part of
    #PINKtober, which is breast cancer awareness month.

    One in nine women is at a high risk of developing breast
    cancer in her lifetime. However, if diagnosed at an early stage, the chances of
    survival increase over 90 percent.