Pakistan People’s Party (PPP) Vice President and Parliamentary leader Sherry Rehman has highlighted a very common and a misogynistic issue women face in the workplace.
In her latest post on X (formerly Twitter), Rehman alluded to male professionals in Pakistan who discriminate in their manner of addressing female colleagues.
“I am sorry but I cannot allow myself to be called only “Sherry” if the colleagues next to me are called so and so sahibs along with their full names as a mark of respect.
I have no problem if you call me Sherry if you are calling my other male colleagues by their first names too”, she pointed out.
While men in workplaces are commonly referred to as ‘Sir,’ ‘Sahab,’ or by their full name out of respect for their professional status or simply their gender, women, on the other hand, are mostly called by their first name or derogatorily as ‘larki’ or ‘bibi,’ etc.
While professionally, calling someone by their first name is not inherently wrong, using more socially respectful language for men compared to women makes the practice sexist.
This lack of courtesy traditionally stems from the patriarchal idea of deeming women as intellectually and professionally inferior.
Veteran actress Saba Faisal was a guest on the Samaa show ‘Subh Ka Samaa Madehaa Kay Sath’ where she spoke about girls having unrealistic expectations from marriage, including immediately becoming the owner of a home after marrying a man. Her advise to these girls who wished to become financially secure was, not to look for better jobs, but to marry older man.
“Today’s girls think they will immediately become owner’s of homes after getting married and have a lot of wealth. They don’t realise that young men are struggling with their jobs in these periods. If you’re looking for financial stability, then a better choice is that you marry a man who is between the ages of 40 or 50. Since he would be able to fulfil all of your needs.”
Turns out this wasn’t the only housekeeping tip Miss Saba had to offer on the show. She also urged parents to pray for their son’s fortunes, rather than entirely focusing on their daughters because after all it is the son who is responsible for running the entire household. Women can’t become bread winners, Miss Saba? They are solely just burden on their parents because they have to eventually get married and become the responsibility of someone else?
“Parent’s shouldn’t just pray that their daughters fortunes are good, but they should also pray that their sons are blessed in life. They are the ones who are responsible for handling an entire household, and when they get married they have to get a wife who would take care of the entire family. Men have an enormous responsibility.”
Can celebrities please stick to solely acting projects and not churn out advice we never asked for?
Adnan Siddiqui appeared on a recent episode of Ahmed Ali Butt’s podcast ‘Excuse Me’ where he addressed his role in the controversial drama ‘Mere Pass Tum Ho’ and the dialogue ‘do takkay ki larki’ which sparked intense outrage from women in Pakistan.
Butt revealed that he had a conversation with the writer Khalil ul Rehman about the line, to which the writer had responded that he used the word ‘larki’ for one woman. Siddiqui pointed out it was solely directed towards the female character Mehwish (played by Ayeza Khan) rather than a generalisation of all women. He further stressed that audiences should contextualise the dialogue within the drama.
“Mehwish and Shehwaar were both equally blamed for this. Danish, who was deeply in love with his wife, sacrificed a lot for her happiness and was madly in love with her. When he discovered the affair he was outraged, which led to the dialogue. In his rage, he couldn’t use a slur because he’s a man of culture. So this was his slur. Let’s stick to that scenario because that dialogue was solely meant for Mehwish and not all women of Pakistan.”
The host behind reality TV series ‘Tamasha’ urged audiences not to conflate characters to real-life people, pointing out that the characters in the story line were not a reflection of reality.
After India’s historic loss against Australia in the ICC Cricket World Cup final, fans were devastated. Some chose to lash out at Australian players, posting misogynistic and degrading slurs on the Instagram profiles of Australian cricket players Travis Head and Glenn Maxwell as well as their wives.
An Indian firm named Marketing Moves is going viral after they offered a day off to their employees to recover from India’s loss.
“Hi team,” the message read. “In light of India’s loss in the recent WC, we recognise the impact on our team members. To offer some support during this time, the company has decided to grant a one-day leave relaxation. We believe this will provide an opportunity for everyone to regroup and recover. Let’s come back stronger.”
Bollywood A-list couple Alia Bhatt and Ranbir Kapoor were embroiled in several controversies due to the latter’s sexist comments. In August, the actor was slammed by netizens for being a “toxic, privileged man” following Alia’s revelation in a Vogue interview that Ranbir didn’t allow her to wear lipstick when the two were dating.
Now, Alia has addressed the criticism directed at her husband in an interview on Koffee With Karan.
“I have a very candid way of speaking…things just get picked out of context which happened recently. My team told me ‘Ye kuch out of hand jaara hai’. There were serious articles written about how he was a toxic man.”
Alia added that she was concerned about the criticism, as Ranbir is the opposite of toxic.
Ranbir’s advice was to ignore what the media said about her, as long as her career was doing well, Alia narrated.
“Ranbir says this, ‘Alia the audience owns you, they can say whatever the hell they want to say about you, as long as your movies are doing well please don’t complain sitting in your apartment in Bandra.”
Speaking about the criticism, Ranbir revealed he was okay with being labelled as an example of ‘toxic masculinity’, because the fight was bigger than him:
“Recently, I was reading an article about being toxic and something relating to some statement I made, and I understand. Listen, I am on your side. Whatever you are fighting against this toxic masculinity, I am on the side of people who are fighting for it. So, if they want to use me as a face, I am fine because their fight is bigger than just me feeling bad about them having an opinion on what I said.”
Deepika continues to live her best life while living rent free in the minds of haters.
A few weeks back, Deepika and Ranveer raised eyebrows with their ‘Koffee With Karan’ interview where the two revealed they casually dated for a couple of months before getting engaged. The ‘Om Shanti Om’ actress recalled ending an abusive relationship not ready for a serious commitment. The two actors, therefore, kept seeing other people while dating each other. After the two got engaged, they decided to remain a monogamous couple.
Deepika became the target of sexist jokes, and claims that she cheated on Ranveer during their relationship. Now, during an interview with Vogue India, the actress has declared she is past the point of letting trolls dictate her opinions.
“When I feel really strongly or passionately about something, I don’t think twice about expressing myself. I’ve grown to become this person where I’m not afraid of speaking my truth or owning up to mistakes. I’m not afraid of saying sorry,” Deepika responded, as according to Mashable India.
While social media users had Deepika’s back to protect her from the naysayers, the industry did as well. Host of ‘Koffee With Karan’, Karan Johar, did a livestream where he addressed the criticism over Deepika’s comment, and shut down her critics.
“Do what you need to do because no one’s looking,” responded the celebrated director according to The Hindustan Times. “Trolling gets you nowhere. You are landing nowhere.”
Another male actor has decided to raise the misogyny flag with a gross comment and this time, its Mohib Mirza. The actor was featured in a podcast for FHM Pakistan where he talked at length about his career and the controversy surrounding the actor’s marriage to Sanam Saeed. Everything was going well, and we were quite proud of how Mohib shut down allegations of cheating against his first wife Amina Sheikh.
But this was all shot down when Mohib was asked about whether it was him or Sanam who controlled the house.
To which Mohib responded:
“If you’re a man you cannot be shareef. No one should remain in this delusion that a man can be innocent. A woman can be innocent but not a man. It can’t be possible because of genetics. The way it was made it’s not possible for that reason. Do you know how many cells you generate in THAT specific area? Billions! You are made like a machine so you are a machine.”
Where do I even begin with this nonsense. Why do women need to deal with this?
Sab say pehlay tou Mohib sir, equating manliness with strength and femininity with weakness is a relic of the past. If such a thing were real, then men wouldn’t be throwing around chairs and breaking television sets every time their favourite team lost a cricket match. And women wouldn’t be quietly toiling while suffering intense period pain. Have you ever had a chance, Mr Mohib, to read up on our history? Or even perhaps spoken with the women of this country? Sit down with an ordinary Pakistani woman who is not only working at a job, but also taking care of her children, cleaning her house and then dealing with her in-laws. While men in this country, who were apparently born with superior genes, can’t provide proper financial support for the family. The gender you’re calling weak by associating it with femininity is the one holding families together.
And also sir, this is not the first time you and Sanam went viral with your sexist comments. Earlier this year, both Mohib and Sanam were guests on Fahad Mustafa’s show. Sanam was asked whether men need to be dealt with like babies, to which she responded: “You need to take care of men like they are children.” The statement reeks of entitlement and ignorance, and as a couple with a lot of power and social status, you need to be mindful of the kind of words you say publicly.
But you’re lucky Mr Mohib, you’re not the only celebrity who made us want to slam our heads on the wall this week. Javed Sheikh decided it was super cool to publicly announce that he refuses to believe in the slogan ‘Mera Jism Meri Marzi’. He emphasised that a woman is beautiful when she is covered.
Please tell us when and where did any woman ask you for your opinion? Did Haseena Moin ask you for reference when she cast you in her critically acclaimed drama ‘Ankahi’ where you acted opposite a head-strong, opinionated woman who didn’t need to cover up to demand respect from a man? Exactly, sit down.
Why are we still addressing this topic? There’s a war in the Middle East. India is making more progressive movies like ‘Rocky and Rani’ centring around consent and holding men accountable for misogyny, and we’re still debating whether femininity makes a woman weak?
All we will say is these are distractions from real issues, and we are done lecturing men on the basic elements of feminism. Which is why I didn’t bother to go into any details in this piece. Google is free, and at this point celebrities need to realise we can see through their PR attempts. We know what you’re doing when you bring up sexism because it will bring along another month’s easy coverage. Women don’t owe any man an explanation for why they deserve to be respected, and we’re done doing so as well.
Bollywood actor Ranbir Kapoor was the center of criticism from the public when certain moments with his wife, actress Alia Bhatt, didn’t sit well with fans. Recently, the ‘Barfi’ actor went viral after Alia’s interview with Vogue where she revealed Ranbir forbade her from wearing lipstick. This attracted severe criticism from X (formerly Twitter) users who lashed out at Ranbir by labelling him a ‘red flag’ all women should avoid.
Recently in an interview the actor, who’s the son of late star Rishi Kapoor, acknowledged the backlash, stating that he is fine with being labeled the face of toxic masculinity.
“Recently, I was reading an article about being toxic and something relating to some statement I made, and I understand. Listen, I am on your side. Whatever you are fighting against this toxic masculinity, I am on the side of people who are fighting for it. So, if they want to use me as a face, I am fine because their fight is bigger than just me feeling bad about them having an opinion on what I said,” the actor opined according to The Indian Express.
The ‘Tamasha’ actor said he accepted a long time ago he would become a part of “gossip blogs”, and further said it didn’t matter to him what critics said.
Ranbir also said him not being active on social media helps in not having to deal with the negativity that comes with being an actor “which is a great thing.”
But also, Ranbir added, his focus always remained on his work, and takes opinions about his image with a pinch of salt:
“Sometimes a lot of things are written about you as an actor, and many opinions are made, which are not necessarily true, but you have to take it with a pinch of salt. Because this image of mine, which is being created by the movies or the characters I play or by media, is something that I don’t own. It is owned by the public, it is owned by people who like or dislike my work and they are allowed to say anything as long as they give my work a chance. My focus has always been just to act.”
Pakistan’s sweetheart Mahira Khan has officially married her long-term partner Salim Karim over the weekend. Short snippets we received of the ceremony showed it was an emotional moment for the bride and groom, who could be seen shedding tears as Mahira walked down the altar, looking mesmerising in ivory.
We’re incredibly happy for her, and we will keep championing women finding their happily ever after- but it seems like the Pakistani instinct to crush any woman in love remains ever present like some disease. Because we can’t fathom the idea that a woman could marry for love, right? Itna rata tou Pakistani dramas ko dekh kar lagwa liya hai.
A tweet has gained a lot of traction on X (formerly Twitter) where a user shared the unverified net worth of Mahira’s husband Salim- which totaled up to $1 million dollars, claiming that the actress got married for the sake of money rather than love.
“So in the end, its all about money. Larkooo!! Paise kamao ….” the user wrote.
Why would the biggest actress of Pakistan- who is also an ambassador for international brands like Lux- want to marry for money? Mahira doesn’t even star in most of the biggest projects currently airing in Pakistan, yet she makes international headlines because of a small snippet from her wedding. The math is not mathing here.
Why did we feel so necessary to write a long piece slamming this insensitive tweet, since we have lives as well? Because this isn’t just something Mahira alone has faced. Countless women in Pakistan are scrutinised for marrying of their own accord, or even being happy in their marriages because on a regular basis they are met with gossip mongers’ who assume these women married for money. But these women and Mahira are not being targetted because of money- it’s because our ghulami mindset mulk can’t imagine a woman being this happy on her wedding day and being in love with a man. It doesn’t sit right with Pakistanis that a woman is miserable since she has been bound for life to another man, and Mahira isn’t.
Mahira Khan is a woman who is completely self-made, did not rely on any man to build up her career, and then went on to travel the entire world on her own while being a single mother. A woman living her life on her own terms, choosing to get married in her forties and doing so while having been married previously and also having a son? Not something easy to swallow for a Pakistani man.
Our mard hazarat can’t settle on the prospect that any woman can be financially secure and choose who she wants to marry, since our cultural upbringing teaches us it is men who can be the sole providers and women must depend on them for survival so therefore, marriage is done purely on the basis of financial security, not for love or comfort. But here is a woman marrying someone she was in a relationship with for a while, and shattering this stereotype while looking phenomenal on her wedding. Clearly the knee-jerk reaction is to assume Mahira is a gold digger, right?
Have social media users learned about the concept of leaving other people’s private business alone? It is not Mahira’s job to justify to you why she chose to get married, and it clearly is no one’s business to make assumptions about such a thing. Rather than fixating on whether an actress had any ulterior motives behind marrying, focus this much energy on your own life because trust us- by the end of the day Mahira will keep outshining her haters and so will every other woman who laughed away on her wedding.
No woman owes any one explanations about her personal life, and we hope Mahira keeps on living rent-free in the minds of haters.
If you’re chronically online like the rest of us, you’ve probably noticed that among the top trends on Twitter is the term ‘boy math’. What even is this trend all about and why is it all the rage on social media? We got all the deets here.
Boy math is a term that was begun to counteract sexist backlash ignited by men on Twitter that women are not good at math or any technical things. Pakistani women are currently leading the game with some hilarious burns using the boy math trend, and we’re sharing some of the responses here.
Boy math is being afraid of gold diggers when you only have 3 pairs of socks to your name.
