Tag: Tradition

  • Noor Bukhari apologises to Zoya Nasir for criticising bride’s dress

    Noor Bukhari recently expressed her reservations over a local bride’s outfit.

    “Where are we heading? Is this our tradition?,” said Noor while talking about the bride’s dress.

    Noor’s comments irked Zoya Nasir who jumped in to defend the bride.

    “It’s her wedding day. It’s her dream day,” said the actor. “The bride is not enforcing her beliefs or lifestyle on anyone and no one has the right to publicly disgrace her very personal choice with their own two cents.”

    “Lest no forget what the person in objection has done in the past,” she continued. “She had pretty good role to play where we are headed. If Ms Noor was free to do what she did, same goes for everyone else.”

    “It’s good that she had a calling and is following her faith but that doesn’t give her the authority to name and shame,” she added.

    Responding to Zoya’s outrage, Noor apologised to her.

    “I apologise Ma’am Zoya Nasir. I did very wrong in past and I regret what I did,” said the former actor.

    “It concerns me because there use to be a time dulhan looked so pretty in haya,” said Noor. “But still I realised my mistake and took down the post.”

    “Where is the freedom of speech? Why [does] it [have] to become news whenever I post anything on my post or page?” questioned Noor.

    “Still I apologise for my mistake. Ab me chup hi rahun gi,” she added.

    Bukhari turned to religion to seek contentment after her fourth divorce. She has often used social media to share her religious experiences and spread spiritual awareness. In January 2020, she reportedly remarried ex-husband and Pakistan Tehreek-e-Insaf leader Awn Chaudhry. The couple has two daughters together.

  • Dowry culture

    According to a recent survey conducted by Pulse Consultants, more than 50 per cent Pakistanis believe that a girl’s family should give dowry when she is getting married. Around 61 per cent respondents were of the view that dowry should be allowed in the Pakistani system while 36 per cent were against it. Almost 73 per cent women believed that dowry should be allowed whereas 24 per cent were against it.

    This survey’s results should not be surprising given that dowry has become an unfortunate reality in our region.

    Dowry is used as a measure of worth for the bride; it is used as a bargaining tool or as a price tag when marrying off girls. This is rooted in the patriarchal and misogynist belief that daughters are a burden when they are born and so to marry them off, a price must be attached to them to ‘lure’ a groom. Despite laws against dowry in the country, this ‘tradition’ continues. Underage girls are often married so that the family gives less dowry in comparison to an adult bride. Many women are left unmarried because their families cannot afford to give a sizeable dowry. This tradition is one that perpetuates violence against women. Pakistan has a high rate of dowry-related deaths. Many women are tortured and even killed for not meeting the dowry requirements of their in-laws. Laws can only do so much. Not many people would report that the other party is demanding dowry for their daughter’s hand in marriage. Dowry transcends all classes. A lot of people would say what they are giving to their daughter is a ‘gift’ when actually it is more like ‘ransom’. Sometimes it is also used to deny a woman her inheritance rights – once dowry is given, the family says they have no rights in their inheritance any more. In a patriarchal society, women are treated like a property or objects instead of human beings with any rights. Dowry is a custom that encourages such thinking.

    The need of the hour is a public awareness campaign against dowry and why this cultural tradition must end. Both the government and the media need to do their part to educate the masses that there are laws against dowry in the country and also why this custom is a social evil. The acceptability of dowry will not end overnight. It will take years of education and awareness for the masses to eradicate this menace.